While home, one of the things I was asked about the most is the monkeys...now i know that they are cute, and different from anything in the states...but really, they are far more of a nuisance than anything..in fact, they are one of the highest causes of stress in my life in Mussoorie. I am not kidding.
It isn't everyday in America that are walking up the hill to work, and nearly there, when you sight a monkey...a big, 80 pound, vicious monkey who begins to growl and show his teeth, causing you to fear for your life and run away and thus, be late for work. Or what about when you are trying to teach a class, and the monkeys are playing king of the hill on the roof above you, so loudly, that the students cannot hear you so you have to stop teaching until they decide to stop their games. Or when you wake up in the morning, make some toast, then go back to bed, waking up forty minutes later to your roommates unraveling the house looking for the bread that you know you put back on the counter.. two hours later, a monkey is spotted in the yard, empty bread bag in hand.. the only legitimate answer? He came into the house, stole the bread off the counter and remembered to shut the door on his way out...
those are all tales of the past. while I'm sure I will have more work tardies and wasted class times on behalf of these obnoxious beasts, those types of scenarios are the least of my current troubles.
it seems like the monkeys have gotten even more out of hand lately, and i thought i would share a few of the more recent escapades with you...(thank you nan onkaa for the blog idea and numerous photos)
1. we returned back to Mussoorie to find it nice and silent, and for two whole days, I did not see a single monkey. It was heaven. turns out, the rhesus monkeys (the especially mean species) have been relocated to a local national park. this happens every year and we are left with peaceful, safe streets for a few months, and then, well, they migrate back. My housemate, Nan, did some serious researching and found the following article:
Monkey relocation in full swing in Mussoorie
Thursday, 13.01.2011, 04:59pm (GMT+5.5)
By Sunil Sonker
Mussoorie, 13 Jan: Under the aegis of Nagar Palika, Mussoorie, the monkey relocation drive is in full swing after persistent complaints by the residents of the town. The monkey population, which has soared to an alarming level, has become a nuisance for tourists and residents and relocation is considered the only option to solve the problem.
According to Rohitash Sharma, EO, Nagar Palika, the monkeys are being trapped with the assistance of a team that has come from Mathura, led by a professional trapper, and till today many monkeys had been caged and released in Mohand and Doiwala forests during the past few days.
The residents of Mussoorie, especially the housewives, are happy with this drive, as the monkeys harassed the womenfolk even more.
However, the scientists are unhappy and are apprehensive about the whole relocation drive carried out by the Nagar Palika authorities.
According to the monkey experts and scientists, the methodology of relocation is not foolproof and has major shortcomings. The experts, under condition of anonymity, said that relocation was a temporary option and a long term solution needed to be looked into regarding this. They also said that mass awareness and banning of human feeding was the answer to the problem.
People were of the view that decrease in forest cover was a major reason for the monkeys thronging to urban areas, particularly as they are social animals that thrive in urban centres. They further added that the Alpha male ought to be captured and sterilised, which would help in controlling the population of these monkeys.
-Garhwal Post, January 13, 2011
She also discovered in the course of her research, that the occupation of a monkey catcher falls under the job category of a civil construction worker....
2. We have no laundry machines. The washing is done in a bucket, while the drying takes place on the line. On the rare occasion that us women of Midlands Duplex actually feel motivated enough to go through the laborious and annoying process of laundry, we end up hanging our clothes on the line while we go to school, hoping to soak up any rays of sun possible. Recently, a note was found from a student who had been staying next door on top of a pile of folded clothes:
Ms. Onkka, I was staying next door with the Wilkins, when the monkeys decided to steal your clothes of the clothes line. They were scattered all over the yard and even ended up in a tree...but I think I retrieved everything. They need to be rewashed...I'd be guessing. -BExcellent. Of course, we didn't rewash the clothes. Another time, I came home to find a monkey trying to put his head through the neck of Lauren's favorite shirt. It was quite the dilemma, and I had to strategically chase the monkey, hoping he wouldn't run off with the shirt around his neck because Lauren would have been absolutely devastated.
3. This Friday my goal was to catch up on sleep. I went to bed around 11, and was planning on sleeping in until it was not physically possible to any longer. 6:45 am rolls around and I wake to hear a massive thump above my head. I was confused and half asleep and figured it was storming. Then I heard a noise that sounded like running getting closer and closer; I became convinced one of my housemates was running laps in the hallway. I began to get upset. Branches in the trees outside began to rustle and then pick up a rhythm similar to that of a tree blowing furiously in a hurricane. At this point, I still had not opened my eyes and was attempting to fall back asleep and ignore the raging storm outside. I finally mustered enough strength to lift my eyelids and noticed two things: one. the sun was out. how could it be storming if the sun was out? and two. a freaking monkey was staring in my bedroom window at me.
this was the point that i began to get pretty annoyed. no way were monkeys going to keep me from sleeping in. i tried putting the pillow over my head. i put ear plugs in. i turned sigur ros on. nothing helped. nan described the noise as monkey try outs for track and field happening on the roof and the sides of our house; i agree. i couldn't take it any more so got out of bed, noticing that now, there were five monkeys peering into my window, and the entire yard was a playground for the langur monkeys..apparently, now that the rhesus monkeys have been relocated, the langurs think they can play wherever they want. and their favorite location? our house.
Here is a play by play of what we have to deal with on what should be a nice, sleepy, Saturday morning...
DAMAGE INCURRED:
(blatant evidence as to why emily shriver hates monkeys...)
After our neighbor, Howard, chased the monkeys away, we were blessed with a bit of peace and quiet. I decided to take advantage of it and nap. i laid down, began to drift of and WABAAM. Monkey track and field tryouts on the roof resume. At this point, I was beyond tired and lost all patience. I stumbled from bed absolutely raging, screaming many brutal threats at the monkeys and desperately wishing I had a slingshot or air gun. eventually, i was able to suppress my anger and even managed to get a few good photos of the langurs. However, this does not make me like them any more. not even close.
So next time you are outside enjoying a peaceful stroll through the woods, or napping in a quiet place, just think about how nice you have it not having to deal with the shenanigans of monkey business.
Living on a mountain side, with limited contact to the outside world, it is sometimes very easy to loose perspective and forget that you are supposed to act like a 'real adult'...lately, we have been making it a goal in our day to day lives to be as adult as possible.. little goals like: don't go into bed before 8 pm(this is very hard to do when it's freezing everywhere else in the house), eat real meals.. cheese and crackers does NOT qualify as a meal, shower at least twice a week (once we master this goal, we might consider uping the ante to three times..) do our laundry every so often; at least the long underwear layers we wear everyday, make it to Hindi lessons on a regular basis, scavenge wood for the fire, little things of the sort..
It continued on into Saturday when Nan and I ventured into Dehradun to shop for household goods like real adults. the only problem is, you have to walk everywhere. Now Nan and i already stand out due to our white skin and the fact that we are significantly taller than everyone else in India. But by the end of our trip, we were a total shit show..picture two white girls in an extremely chaotic indian city, trying to cross the street eight different times carrying a bookshelf, 4 large baskets, 7 bags and 9 large posters while simulataneously trying to eat the best toffee in the world which was purchased at a run down hotel's front desk- the name of the hotel and toffee...KWALITY (yes, as in quality with a kw). luckily, we made it back up the mountain in one piece and sadly, there is no photographic evidence. however, i would like to share with you the posters we accumulated..words can not describe just how wonderful and hilarious these really are...we are thinking of putting an art gallery of them in our house...kind of like something real, mature adults would do....right?!
Can someone please tell me what that bird like monster is?
That night, our friend Paul had a raging party at his place, on our way there, we heard a very strange noise coming from the woods. I mentioned it sounded odd and Lauren and Nan told me to not worry about it, that it was just a baby monkey. after arriving at Pauls, we got a phone call from the principal of the school saying not to go anywhere, there were leopards all around campus, including outside of his home, the house we were walking past when we heard the 'baby monkey'. that's the last time i listen to Nan and Lauren. Anyway, where i was going with the story of the party is that, unlike real adults, who dress up and put effort into going out, we wore our typical 5 layers, hats, gloves and the like...
Sunday was filled with big ambitions- while most 23 year olds spend majority of sunday morning sleeping off saturday night,we had climbed a mountain for our favorite french toast, ate breakfast, gone grocery shopping, had a potentially dangerous interaction with mules, and
tonight we cooked. a lot. it made quite the mess. but, like real adults, we have to eat. unlike real adults, we pay about forty dollars a month to have our ayah, Saroj clean everyday. so this mess, tomorrow when we come home exhausted from school, will be gone. tough life.
psh. real adults? ..who are we kidding?
